Thursday, October 29, 2009

My favorite movie monsters...ever

The title makes this pretty obvious. These are my absolute favorite disgusting creatures from the horror (sci/fi too) genre. You will notice that these monsters are from specific movies. I am not using general terms like "vampire" (I kind of hate them now anyway) because that's boring and this blog is a boring-free blog of death. Enjoy:

Pumpkinhead- Stan Winston created this ugly bastard for his film of the same name. Ugly and pissed, this guy enjoys tearing stupid rednecks apart. Sometimes he likes killing city folk who fuck with rednecks. Either way, Pumpkinhead kicks ass.

Dr. Pretorious from "From Beyond"- This evil bug-eyed tentacled slimy monster does some truly awesome/horrible things throughout the movie. He especially likes eating people. And the ladies. If you haven't seen it, I suggest you do so immediately.

Jeff Goldbloom's Fly from "The Fly"- How did they make Jeff Goldbloom look more like an insect than he does normally? Also, how cool was it when he spit fly juice on that magazine editor guy and his leg melted? Or when he fused with a piece of metal to create a grotesque fly/washing machine hybrid? Love the creature effects.

Grant Grant from "Slither"- More bug-eyed slimy monster goodness. This guy likes to eat/absorb people. He likes to impregnate silly redneck girls with slug monster babies. He likes meat. He has an inexplicably hot wife. I love this movie and you should too. I mean look at this guy. Ladies I ask you, you would totally take him home wouldn't you?

The Thing- The best creature ever. It turns into whatever it wants to and fucks everything up. Anyone around when this thing shows itself gets eaten in a brutal fashion. Plus, nothing is better than seeing Wilford Brimley, diabetes and al,l turn into a large alien creature. I just wish it didn't kill all the dogs. I like dogs.

The Chatterer from "Hellraiser"- If he talked he'd be cooler than Pinhead. Either way he just looks fucking awesome.

The devil/oracle thing from "Nightbreed"- After seeing this movie I'm still not entirely sure what the hell this thing is supposed to be, but it looks cool. It also can burn priests at will and tell monster/human people their futures. I think that's pretty cool.

The 1986 version of the Blob- It's a huge gelatinous mass that devours humanity in the grossest ways possible. Face melting like you see after an Iron Maiden triple guitar solo. Love it.

The queen from "Aliens"- "Get away from her you BITCH!"

The mom monster from "Dead Alive"- This picture in no way does this vile creature any justice. Saggy boobed monster zombie bitch from hell. That is my description and I am sticking to it. Bless Peter Jackson for his grotesque imagination.

The Creature from the Black Lagoon- I had to go old school for at least one of these. I love how cheesy this guy is. It's a dude in a rubber suit. So what it was fucking 1954. You go ahead and do better.

I might do another volume of this. I want feedback dammit.

1 comment:

Lee said...

The original mummy from 1932 is pretty ugly. Pennywise, helloooo. Count Orlok. Leatherface is ugly, too.